Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Sarah Palin Jr.

Today has been bizarre.

I was in a strange mood when I woke up today. Like... I was tired, and wanted to sleep, but at the same time I didn't want to be in bed and I wanted to go for a walk. School dragged by very slowly. We have our study guides for our final (eeesh, I can't believe it's already here) and we're going over them in class, so that means I have no homework. I've been having a strange argument with a friend of mine for about three days or so... I don't want to go into details.

I babysat today... and the kid kept throwing books in my lap and demanded that I read them, then she picked them up, ran off, ran laps around the couch, got the books, and the cycle repeated itself. I was hoping she would fall asleep and leave me alone, but I wasn't that lucky. I don't mind kids... I think they're adorable, but I don't trust myself around them and I can only stand them for so long. Also, the kid's mother is going out of town for a few months, and offered me a bunch of money if I take care of her dogs while she's away. I'm much better with dogs than I am with children (and adults), so I would be happy to.

Oh, and Michele Bachman is running for president. Can you believe it? Sarah Palin Jr wants to be president. And Sarah Palin is still thinking about running. Don't worry about it sweetheart... it's not like you're going to win anyway.

LMAO... what if the Republican Party candidates boil down to just Bachman and Palin? Oh gawd, that would be hilarious. I would pay lots of cash to see them in a political debate against each other. The only real differences between them is that Palin is from Alaska and Bachman can actually name a newspaper... I think.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

So very, very bored...

I'm sitting in the computer lab at my school at the moment, being bored. We're supposed to be working on our stock projects... but I'm done for the day so I have nothing to do while the teacher is also messing around on the computer. It's funny, no one is working on anything academic.

The down side to having your hair cut really short: your neck is always cold.

I've been looking at publishing agents... which is funny, because I haven't completed anything worth sending in to one. I have started a novel though... but it's still very rough and unpresentable. Maybe, just maybe, I might actually finish this one. As much as I write, I've never stuck with a novel to the very end. The day I finish a novel will be the day the world ends...

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Chanters = Epicness

I must be cursed... these past two days have hell for me.

My e-mail was hacked and I lost $20 that was in my pocket when I went to buy milk and eggs for my mom. Ugh... I hate to think what tomorrow will be like.

I ditched PWI because the music was driving me insane, and I decided to play Aion until my subscription runs out. I'm starting fresh on a new server... because Zikel is a terrible server and all of the Asmos are lazy bums who have lame excuses for not attending sieges. Aion is built for PvP... you shouldn't be afraid of sieges, otherwise, you're better off playing a different game. I'm on Vaziel now, since some people spoke so highly of it. My chanter's name is... Ladynaga. It's a shame that some people don't get both references.

Unlike the current PWI, Aion has beautiful music. My favorite song would have to be Song of Moonlight:

I can't wait to do Kromede's Trail again... that quest is so amazing. It took me over and hour to complete on my old sorcerer, and it'll probably take even long on my chanter, but I still look forward to it. It has an amazing plot. You spent so much time hating Kromede in Fire Temple, because she's so damn strong... but then you learn her story. What's amazing is that during the quest, it's like you're having this dream where you actually are Kromede.

Friday, June 24, 2011

RIP little piggy...

I have a busy day today, which is unfortunate, because I'm so incredibly tired.

So, I'm going to the library to hopefully hunt down a copy of The Crucible. I have to read that before Sophmore year offically starts... I thought it would be about the Burning Times when I first heard the title and thought "oh wow, this should be interesting." But then my mom told me it's about family values... and I felt like vomitting on the carpet because is sounded incredibly boring. A friend of mine who started reading the book says that it talks about witchcraft, so that lifted my spirits a bit... it seems like every person I talk to about the book has something different to say and I don't know who to believe.

Lets see... I'm getting new shoes today, since the pair that I'm wearig is about ready to fall apart and the rest of them don't really fit me anymore. I'm also getting my hair cut and I'm eating out with my mom.

Yesterday... I accidently ate bacon. My mom got some food from Panera Bread and got me what I usually ate there... a turkey sandwich. I refused to eat it, but she just shrugged and said "fine, then you can go hungry today," so I ended up eating it anyway. She's been very concerned about my health lately... so that's why she bought me something with meat in it. She forgot to tell them not to put any bacon in the sandwich, so I had to pick it out. I thought I picked out all of the bacon, but there was still some left... I took a bite and thought "wow, this tastes odd..." (I didn't have bacon for about a year before hand) and then looked in the sandwich and realized I didn't take all of it out. Since it was such a small amount, it didn't make me sick... but I felt really bad about it and my stomach started cramping. I felt bad about eating the turkey too. Damn it, I STILL feel bad about it.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

These past couple of days...

I found a local metaphysical store... or rather, by mom found it and told me about it. I bought a bunch of incense and some goddess cards. They had a tiny cauldron that was absolutely adorable, buuut it looks like I have to save my money lol. And they had SO MANY TAROT DECKS!! I was amazed at the selection they had in such a tiny little store. They also have some books about Buddhism and Hinduism... and some very expensive eastern statues. Oh, and crystals... shiny crystals... there's a reason why I don't have that many around, because I can stare at them for hours... because they're so shiny. What? I don't think I'm insane...

So, some violent storms swept through the area last night. It was fantastic in such a terrible way. The sky was incredibly dark and the wind was howling. Thankfully, we didn't get much damage out here... but a lot of people are without power, including a few kids in my Consumers Ed class. My mom locked me in the bathroom with the cat and dog while it was going on. We both felt really silly when it passed, and we poked around outside to see that no damage had been done, except for a few stray branches and leaves.  

Oh, and once again, I have a cold... well, I'm not sure if it's a cold. It may be my allergies, which would be very odd. I didn't have a problem with them last year at all. I missed class yesterday too, because I slept through my alarm clock... I was just too exhausted to get out of bed.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

I'll miss you...

I think my heart will split in two. My childhood is ending, ending, ending... I can feel it slipping away with every second that ticks by. Why, you ask? Why is this happening to me? Let me show you...

Oh, the scene with Lily and Harry at the beginning... gawd, I had to try so hard to keep myself from crying. This story was my childhood. Part of it died when I read the last line of book 7. It will die completely on the epilog of movie 7 pt 2. Harry... he's gone so far. He was a thought in Rowling's head on a train, and now... he's a character beloved by millions. He, and his creator, will go down in history as the childhood of most of a generation.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

UN Owen Was Her?

Anyone who can play this... IS A LIVING GOD!!!

My Consumer's Ed class is... strange. We talked about the economy... and the national debt... and China... and Greece... and some other stuff... Just not your typical "OMG don't use credit cards!! nuuuu!!"

Yeah, not much to say today. My ritual was cancelled due to rain. Speaking of rain, I had to stand out in it for half an hour while I waited for the bus. My pants were soaked and my feet were wet the whole day. It was awful.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

10 of my favorite songs

Once again, not in any particular order...

Tam Lin - Tricky Pixie

"Father, if I be with child,
'twill prove a wondrous birth
for well I swear it's not the get
of any mortal man on earth."

Your Star - Evanescence

"Nothing worth fighting for
We're wandering now
All in parts and pieces, swim lonely
Find your own way out"
Crownless - Nightwish

"Mine is the Earth and the sword in the stone
Mine is the throne for the idol
One fleeting moment and it is all gone"

Re-Education (Through Labor) - Rise Against

"I won't crawl on my knees for you
I won't believe the lies that hide the truth
I won't sweat one more drop for you"

Alive! - Omnia

"Hot like the sun
Wet like the rain
Green like the leaves
Life is a game"

Fully Alive - Flyleaf

"Fully alive,
More than most
Ready to smile
And love life."

White Flag Warrior - Flobots feat. Tim Mcllrath

"We'd rather make our children
(We request to negotiate)
Martyrs then Murderers
(We come to you unarmed)
We'd rather make our children
(We desire to communicate)
White Flag Warriors!!" 

My Last Breath - Evanescence

"Closing your eyes to disappear
You pray your dreams will leave you here
But still you wake and know the truth
No one's there"

All I Need - Within Temptation

"Don't tear me down
For all I need
Make my heart a better place
Give me something I can believe"

Broken Moon

Sunday, June 12, 2011


I want to be a jockey now... this looks awesome:

I miss horses so, so much... I used to horseback ride, but I can't afford lessons anymore. I also used to volunteer at the stables, too. The people I worked for were complete bitches... they sat in the air conditioned office while we worked out in the hot sun. It was worth it, though. I just loved being around the horses... there was this one mare named Lady who would use my head as a chin rest... she was so funny. And there was a gelding named Seymour who was terrible with pretty much every rider except me.  

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Freshman Year

Yus, two posts in one day. I'm SO productive.

I guess that since my Freshman year is officially over now (that means I have to start calling myself a Sophomore now... that feels so awkward) I should put down some of my best memories from this year... to be honest, there aren't that many.

  • The awards ceremony on the last day of Orchestra. I won three of them... "Funniest Person" (how on earth did that happen?) "Best Artist" and "Most likely to succeed" (that made me laugh). Also, one of the girls got "Best Country Accent". As she stormed up to get her award, she yelled "I DON'T HAVE AN ACCENT!!" in a slightly obvious southern twang. 
  • My CSO trip. Good Italian food, making an idiot of myself in Millennium Park, failing with a friend of mine in some grass, good music, and returning home with a good excuse to not do my English homework.
  • Homecoming game. I was sitting with my friends in some grass, and this dude walks over and puts his arm around me. I glare at him and say "dude, I've never seen you before in my life." and he walks away with a lobster red face. We were giggling about it for the remainder of the game. I also told them some horror stories... we left before the game actually ended, because we were getting our asses kicked. Hard. 
  •  Holiday party 2B before Winter Break. I got a sugar high in public. If you haven't seen me with a sugar high, be thankful that you haven't.
  • NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month). You basically try to write a 50k word story in a month. I didn't make it, but my friend Hillary and I went to some write-ins at Borders and it was amazing. 
  • Surprisingly, my birthday. My birthdays usually suck and I always end up with a nasty cold. That day wasn't an exception... the cold part, anyway. I couldn't go two minutes without having to wipe off the snot that was pouring from my nose like a faucet. My mom wanted to take me to this new restaurant, but we couldn't find it. So, we showed up at Olive Garden severely under dressed. The food was great. Then we went to a small concert at Harper collage. Two classical guitarists were playing and they were so fun to listen to. I returned home with a 101 fever and my speech was barely legible behind the snot and sore throat.  
  •  Poetry Slam. Some of the kids at my school are amazingly talented... listening to their poems was very enjoyable. 

Yeah, that's it... Freshman year wasn't so bad. It was better than 8th grade at least... and that was arguably the worst year of my life. 


So, I've started playing PWI again. They have a new race and two new classes now, but I had no interest in trying them. I went back to my old Venomancer.

Yeah, apparently they're giving away epic gear now... but it only lasts for 19 days. What's the point of that? You get used to having a good defense (except for me... cuz I'm a squishy) and then it just disappears. "Oh, sorry, you have to buy new gear now... buy some random items that you have to buy with real money from our item mall, and sell them for ridiculously high prices... so you can afford to craft gear that's just as good..." ... Nevermind, I see the point now.   


It used a variety of songs that were mysterious and epic... now it's just the same annoying song over, and over, and over, and over... everywhere you go, it's the same song. 

I understand that games need to make progress... but I really, really miss the original version... when there were three races and six classes. THAT was what I fell in love with (but then I found out about Rohan and I was like "ha, screw this"). The Tideborn look a bit lame and the trailer for their patch scared me. The Earthguard look pretty cool, and the Genesis trailer was epic... but I don't feel that they bring anything valuable to the story. The existence of the Tideborn and Earthguard just ruin the original story. Pangu made THREE races... not six, THREE. 

Don't mind my nerd-raging xD

.... gawd, I miss that music so much

Friday, June 10, 2011

7 of my favorite music videos

They're not in any particular order, btw.

Ready To Fall - Rise Against

"Every action has a reaction. We have one planet, and one chance"

"The measure of society can be how well its people treat its animals" ~ Gandhi

Handlebars - Flobots

"Dictatorship naturally rises out of democracy, and the most aggravated form of tyranny and slavery out of the most extreme liberty" ~ Plato

Good Enough - Evanescence

"When you go through a tragedy, you can either let that destroy you and you become bitter and never let that go, or you can let it make you stronger and let it make you grow. And that's what I did." ~ Amy Lee

Help Is On The Way - Rise Against

I don't really have a quote for this one... it's just an amazing video

Don't Stop - Innerpartysystem

"What is fame? The advantage of being known by people of whom you yourself know nothing, and for whom you care as little." ~ Lord Byron 

Utopia - Within Temptation

"Man is the only creature that refuses to be what he is." ~ Albert Camus

Hero Of War - Rise Against

"The tragedy of war is that it uses man's best to do man's worst." ~ Harry Emerson Fosdick 

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Make up your mind, Nature...

GAAAAHHH!! I can't take the weather any more!! First it was unseasonably cold for about a week, then it was unseasonably hot... now it's back to unseasonably cold again. My computer says it's 51 outside. Yesterday, it was in the 80's. *facedesk*

My English final sucked because it was too easy, which probably means I failed it. My Algebra final sucked because it confused me, which probably means I passed with flying colors. Tomorrow I have my World History final, and then I'm free of school until Wednesday.

Still haven't been doing that much writing lately... that needs to change.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Art teachers are scary...

First day of finals. I didn't have one 1st block... I could've slept in, but we don't have a working car and I wasn't sure if there would be a bus before 2nd block. So, I hung out in the library, studied and wasted some time on the internet. 2nd block was my Biology final... I have a feeling that I failed it. Aaaand 3rd block was my Art + Design final.

3rd block was weird. I left my independent project on the teacher's desk, and when he walked in, he looked at it and yelled "WHOSE IS THIS!!".

Me: "Uhh... mine?"

Teacher: "... it's beautiful..."

Then everyone wanted to see it. He also kept it so he can put it on display next year. I honestly don't know what to think. Yes, I put a lot of effort into it. No, I don't think it's worthy of being put on display. But oh well, I guess it was worth something, since my Art teacher is very hard to please.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Death is a bitch... a stupid, stupid bitch

I've been under a lot of stress lately, so I've been shying away from the sad and depressing things I usually involve myself with, and surround myself with happy things... or, things I could consider to be happy. Gloating about how superior Harry Potter is to Twilight happens to be one of them.

I also haven't gotten that much writing done, which I need to do... I promised my small circle of readers on that I'll post weekly now.

My sad, sad mind has been hanging on to one depressing thought lately, though. And that would be war.

Some of them in history were, in fact, necessary. The French and American Revolutions and some of the battles in WW2... but silly things like Vietnam, Iraq and who knows how many old wars fought purely over territory or bragging rights... that's just idiotic. Life is such a valuable thing... and we're all the same in so many ways. We all understand physical and emotional pain, and are capable of feeling it. We're all human. We all have similar needs. It goes beyond just humans, too. Animals... even trees. Not many can see or even bother to look, but with every decision we make, we impact something else. The death of one human could be the suffering of so many others. And the same applies to all living things.

Monday, June 6, 2011


Twilight won the MTV movie awards. Are you effin kidding me. It was rigged!! RIGGED I TELL YOU!!

I would have been happy if Harry Potter won, but Black Swan was the one I was voting for. To those of you who haven't seen it, if you can get past the sex, it's a wonderful movie.

Oh, and little miss Kristen won Best Performance.... *facepalm* I'm not even going to comment on that, the idiocy speaks for itself. It was quite entertaining, though. First, Kristen was like:

And then Emma Watson was all:

Emma has every right to give her the evil death glare of doom. She can act rings around that chick.

Sunday, June 5, 2011


Hang on... just let me get my thoughts in order here...

No... I don't have to. Just watch:

... Yes, the new IMNOTASPARKLEFAIRYIMAFRIGGINVAMPIRE movie trailer is out...

BWUAHAHAHA!!! They're trying WAY too hard.

"Oh yay!! Me and Edward are married!!" "... I'm pregnant. THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!!"

I have nothing against you if you like Twilight, so please don't be angry with me... but... HOW? How is that possibly entertaining? I fell asleep watching the 1st movie and I'm too terrified that my brain will be raped if I watch the other two. It's a complete disgrace to paranormal romance...

Saturday, June 4, 2011

Leave at once, punny human

So, I was going to walk over to the trail by the forest preserve today. I had a water bottle and some snacks packed, and practically bathed in sunscreen (I don't tan that well... I just burn), so I was ready for a nice long walk. I walked a quarter of a mile before I was like "oh my gawd... it's so hot out here..." so I wandered in the nicely shaded areas around my apartment complex instead. I took some pretty cool pictures too. A red-winged black bird was nice enough to grace me with his presence... I must have been intruding on his territory, because he kept squawking at me and flying in circles while I was taking pictures of him. I would upload them if I could, but my computer is stoooopid and doesn't read my camera when I plug it in. 

I was able to get a little bit of meditating in, too. The black bird continued to squawk at me for half of it, which was quite distracting. When I got out my granola, a dove poked its head out of the grass and stared at me for a long time... I would have offered it some, but there was some chocolate mixed in there, and I didn't want to make it sick.

Overall, it was a nice day. I need to spend more time outdoors.

Friday, June 3, 2011

Beauty is always found within

I see beauty in things that no one else can see. Music, art, literature... and people. Especially people. The tragic thing is, though, is that they can't see it within themselves. So when I tell them what I see, they don't believe me. And when I tell them, they cover themselves in the darkest cloak of hatred and nastiness to drive me away. And I feel so... helpless... like I failed in them. I failed to help them help themselves. You have no idea how much that hurts.

I'm incredibly stressed out right now. Finals are next week and I'm NOT ready. Then, 5 days after my last exam, it's time for summer school. Why, why did I sign up for six more weeks of torture?

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Stolen from dA

Name: Julie
Age: 15
Gender: Female 

A brief description about yourself? I'm just your not-so-average girl trying to live peacefully with people who are extraordinarily normal. I live in an apartment with my mom, dog (Shelby, nickname: Poochie), cat (Skitty) and hamster (Trixie). Eventually, I want to share my room with a dove. My favorite season is Summer and one day, I hope to be a published author.
Single and proud

How did you come to start writing?
 It seems like I've always been doing it... Since I was little, I've always loved creating characters and telling stories about them. My first piece was a short story I told my mom one night about my cat Petie (I swear, that cat was my guardian angel). Later, she had me write it down and I started calling it a book. I was 4-5. I didn't even consider becoming an author until the end of 6th grade, when my teacher wrote on my report card that she knew my name would be in print someday. My 8th grade L.A. teacher convinced me that I could actually achieve that goal, so I've been working seriously with my writing for over a year now.    

Why do you still write?
 I guess it's just something that I need to do to keep me sane. Even if I didn't want to be published, I would still do it... It's too precious to call a habit or a hobby... You could say it's the best way I can express myself.

What inspires you to write?
The list is endless. Music and coffee are loyal muses to me. Observing nature and watching the world go by are also helpful. Inner demons and my personal "perfect world" often have influences.

How far have you come since you first started?
Very far lol. Thanks to certain individuals, I'm always finding room for improvement.
Is there a poet or writer you look up to, or base your style on? If so, who?
Yes... more than one. I look up to a few famous ones... JK Rowling (for her success and where she came from), Edgar Allen Poe (for the sheer beauty an honesty of his poems, and the dark worlds he creates in his stories) and Ann Frank. There are also friends I have friendly competitions with, which motivates me. I don't really base my style on anyone specific... I guess my style is a mish-mosh of every style that has ever influence me.
Style of music you usually listen to?
 Classical, Symphonic Metal, Hard Rock, Metal, Pop, Soft Rock... anything that isn't hardcore gangster rap, I guess.
What is your element and/or zodiac?
 Water... My Sun sign is Pisces, my Moon sign is Sagittarius and my Venus is Taurus. I consider one's Sun sign to be dominant, so I call myself a Pisces.

If you were a flower, what kind of flower would you consider yourself to be and why?
I would be a tiger lily... unique and out of place.

What is your favorite time of the year and why?
They all have their ups and downs... but I like Summer the best because everything is alive and flourishing. I have more energy then, like I'm in a euphoric high that whole season.

What do you believe in?
Earth is a goddess and we've fucked her up so badly, that she can no longer tolerate mankind, and will destroy us if we don't start changing how we do things. What, you think I'm crazy? Take a look around. She isn't happy.

What do you think is the most important thing/person in your life?
There are so many people and things in my life that I just couldn't live without... I couldn't possibly choose one over the other. If I make a list, it will be endless.

The Acheans are coming, the Acheans are coming!!!

I'm procrastinating... I have an English test to study for and a World History project to start, but I find them both boring. I'm not sure if I've rambled about this yet, but we just got done reading The Odyssey in English. It's a great story, honestly, but the way it's written makes it seem so freakin BORNING. Ughhh. The epic poem has been reduced to a mass of words that barely make any sense, and the teachers expect us to understand it all when we fall asleep just after reading two pages.

I miss To Kill A Mockingbird and Twelve Angry Men. Those were amazing. Romeo and Juliet made me want to cry, because I already knew how the story went. Lord of the Flies... worst story ever. It was the exact opposite of The Odyssey, written beautifully, but the story itself was terrible. I appreciated the symbolism and the depth to the story, but I didn't really agree with the author's view points that much. Yes, human beings are evil, but not naturally so. We're only like that because we give fear a place of power within our minds, which is the root of evil... At least, that's how I see it.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Good Soldier

Awhile ago, perhaps it was December, a friend of mine sent me a song. It wasn't just any song. It was a song that reminded me so much of myself, I wanted to hunt down the group that performed it and demanded to know how they got inside my head and transformed its contents into a song.

I found the song again today... it still applies to me. I guess I don't change much. It's like I'm a broken record, doomed to play the same notes over and over until someone breaks me and throws me in the garbage.

Here are the lyrics. It's "Good Soldier" by Flobots:

"Today you don't have to be a soldier
Don't have to be a soldier, stand down
It's okay to be as you were
Be as you were again

Is it a scheme, is it a vision
Is it a dream, is it a nightmare
Or is it a competition and if it is
What if we don't fight fair?

What's bald in the morning
But in the evening has white hairs?
What's the cause of global warming
And could it be these things right here?

I've got an idea that might not reach
Anyone for another light year
Got a hit-list and a cloud of
Witnesses which is pricier

Well, my tears are mightier
Than my fears so mighty Earth
Provides me hurt that I keep buried
Until I convert it to writing

I was wounded, I was injured
I was made to move to Denver
I was taken through a new adventure
Paint stripped from it's first fixture

I was placed in another picture
I was rushed to a new landscape
And ripped away from family
Scraped into a politician's mistake

And what's left of talents in chests beneath oceans
Welled up behind eyelids has yet to be salvaged
A world of emotions, a guess that it might be okay
That it could be all right if expressed

Today you don't have to be a soldier
Don't have to be a soldier, stand down
It's okay to be as you were
Be as you were again

Am I a woman raised man-machine
Damaging everything I touch?
By not caring enough
Or too much?

Am I a far flung fantasy
Setting free enmity?
And making friends from enemies
And bridges for the in-betweens

For the highwayman on the low road
The tired back with a large load
The trials spanned till I found hope
And I found more when I slo-mo'ed

Enough of the back to face front
Let those in the pack of the race run
I'm needing an evener pace one
Too hasty makes mistakes

Can you carry a song as strong as your arms
Can bear that you keep from harm?
And it will be there when you go wrong
Make a heart from your bond, your treasure's right here

And what's left of talents in chests beneath oceans
Welled up behind eyelids has yet to be salvaged
A world of emotions, a guess that it might be okay
That it could be all right if expressed today

Today you don't have to be a soldier
Don't have to be a soldier, stand down
It's okay to be as you were
Be as you were again"